Story Time!

Yeah, so, we were at the mall today, like usual. Sittin on a bench, enjoying the smell of capitalism and Taco Bell, when a guy walks up.

"Hey.. uh.. heyy.. I...I've been thinking about uh, coming over here and I really just wanted to ask..

Wanna fuck?"

I swear, we can't make this shit up.

The Fauxhawk

-an approximation of a mohawk, made without shaving or buzzing the hair on the sides of the head, allowing an imitation of the look of a true mohawk without having to commit to removing most of one's hair.

It's a hairstyle reserved strictly for people who don't have the balls to get a real mohawk.

What will happen if you get a fauxhawk, you ask? Well as scary as it seems, it could turn into this:

The Hoxton Fin

And, God forbid, you may even start doing this:


The Pony Hawk

Way to go Mentor!

Yes, that is a condom. A used condom. In a bed of mulch. Surrounded by pine cones and bushes. Who, I would like to know, is "doing it" along one of the busiest roads in Mentor? Not even a secluded, could be romantic, outdoor spot, such as the couch at Garfield Park. No, smack dab between sidewalk and someones front lawn. Really, Mentor, Ohio, get some class.
Or at least a room.